TEMPLE TOWERS,TAMIL CINEMA AND TAMANNA!!

The recent news of cracks in various temples towers culminating in the collapse of the Kalahasthi temple has spewed a set of rumors, speculations, predictions and protests in equal measure. While I myself will side with the protests against the bad maintenance of the temples(not that I care much), I couldn't help noticing the speculations that were doing the rounds. Ask any resolute God fearing layman and he will take you through an endless boring lecture on karma and how man has inculcated the wrath of the Gods. Preposterous as it may seem, I found it to be amusing enough to add my own theory to it. After all its just harmless fun and in case I do hurt the sentiments of a few devoted, God fearing religious people........ well thats what you call an unexpected bonus! :)

DISCLAIMER: IF YOU ARE A RELIGIOUS PERSON LOOKING FOR ACTUAL REASONS AS TO WHY THE TEMPLE TOWER CRACKED..... STOP RIGHT THERE..... WHAT FOLLOWS WOULD BE "PREPOSTEROUS AND HEINOUS" IN YOUR OPINION.....

FOR THE REST OF YOU...................

I digress.........

Tamil film industry has been suffering from a dearth of good stories ever since its inception. But even Ronald Emmerich who could herald the end of the world, could have never predicted the debacle that has befallen the tamil film industry. Without further ado, here is the debacle......

In the land of blind men, one-eyed man is the king...............

The one-eyed king(or rather queen) of kollywood........................

TAMANNA!

Tamil cinema has always suffered from a dearth of good storylines, but dearth of heroines was unimaginable.............. until now.........

With Asin and Trisha busy with Bollywood and Nayanthara busy with Prabhu Deva, tamil heroes were stumped!!(obviously its impossible write a story for a tamil film without love as its linchpin and hence the necessity for heroines). Guess who cashed in on the scarcity??? Talk of the devil...

In lieu of the scarcity, qualification for becoming a heroine has been reduced to merely being white and the readiness to shed clothes at the drop of a hat. Tamanna is under the delusion that all that you need to look sexy is to wear skimpy clothes, raise your eyebrows and curl your lips... URGH!!! I haven't got anything personal against her.. She might be a professional who is devoted to her job.. But lets just say she ain't tailor made for the job.. She ain't got.... the oomph factor that a heroine requires........ We could safely say that she is the Ms.Vijay of tamil cinema :)

Talking of Vijay........ I have got statistics to prove my point............

POKKIRI(ASIN)........................ BOX OFFICE HIT

VILLU(NAYANTHARA).......... AVERAGE COLLECTIONS

VETTAIKARAN(ANUSHKA)... MODERATE COLLECTIONS

SURA(TAMANNA)..................... WELL WELL DO I NEED TO SAY MORE??

Its been a long time since Vijay's film depended on Vijay for its success. Lacking a story as well as a decent hero, success of his film largely depends on the heroine. And talking of Sura film who in the hell asked Tamanna to try her hand at comedy??? Every time I see the scene where she tries to commit suicide, I get an irresistible urge to commit suicide myself! Well Vijay has seen the error of his ways. Realising where his strength lies, Vijay is acting with Asin in his next film! I pity the tamil audience though......

This is what Tamanna calls as emoting..............

Tamanna gives an entirely new (literal)meaning to the cliche"IF LOOKS COULD KILL...!"

The tamil audience who were used to the likes of Kushboo and Simran who could emote as well as be glamorous were forced to settle for glamour alone when it came to Nayanthara, Trisha etc.. Now tamil audience are forced to an all time low where they have only Tamanna to look forward to......

The above images are from the film Paiyaa directed by Lingusamy. Initially Nayanthara was slated to act in this film. Unfortunately Lingusamy and Nayanthara had a problem with the salary..............

NAYANTHARA was meant to act in this film.If only she had. Just imagine her in the above photo!! (SIGH SIGH).

And coming to the last part.. There are a few guys who are Tamanna fans!! Ahem Ahem.... What can I say.... Prasanna!! You are either blind or perverted or maybe both!!! :) Grow up boy! :)

NEWS CAST: IN WHAT SEEMS TO BE THE FIRST OF ITS KIND, THE GODS SEEM TO HAVE REALISED THE PLIGHT OF THE HUMANS AND RESPONDED TO THEIR PRAYERS BY EXPRESSING THEIR ANGER THROUGH THE TEMPLE TOWERS!! WHETHER THE TAMIL FILM DIRECTORS WILL CONTINUE TO TEST THE PATIENCE OF THE GODS IS TO BE SEEN... THE GODS' (WHO HAVE TURNED A BLIND EYE TO THE PLIGHT OF HUMANS TILL DATE) SUDDEN ERUPTION HAS FORCED US TO CONCLUDE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING :

1. THE CURRENT PROBLEM IS THE BIGGEST ONE FACED BY HUMANS TILL DATE AND THE GODS DECIDED THAT WITHOUT DIVINE INTERVENTION HUMANS CANNOT SURVIVE THROUGH THIS ORDEAL!!

OR

2. GODS MUST BE CRAZY!!!

OR

3. GODS MUST BE TAMILIANS!!!!! (Yelai avuga enga aaluga da!!) :) :)

It took around 5 hours to write this post. And i had to download the song and take snapshots from it to post the photos here. Whether you realise the effort I put into this post or not, you would have atleast realised how vetti I am!! :) One of the luxuries of getting placed and waiting for the company to call you!! Bless TCS for giving me ample time to ponder on such intricacies:)